im having a high fever right now. and as much as i want to tell you how bad is it before i couldnt. i cant move my body at all. i cant eat, i cant drink. i dont even want to eat mcd. this is far the worse fever i had. before if i catch a fever i could eat. but this time i couldnt. it started this friday. at school while doing maths. i couldnt concentrate. my body temperature rise. and i was so weak. my friends thought that i was crying because of maths -.- . why should i. i didnt study for them anyway. then my mum went straight away to the clinic. the doctor said ni nk demam panas ni. and i was like.....oh gosh. whenever i took the pilll, i sweat alot. then the temperature rise again. gosh.
thank you for calling me, and your concern
-.-
you know what? i noticed that my life is sooo boring now. well, it is boring before. but its more boring now! i do the same things over and over again with same routines and have to face the same faces. i dont know why i felt that way. i dont have a phone. i have to use my mum's phone to contact my friends. for only important stuffs. studying. play the guitar. listen to music. take pictures. watch tv. *hmmpphhhhhhhhh. there is no excitement. im a boring person. i am jealous with everybody busy with their life right now. busy with boyfriends, bands....friends. you know. i dont get that everyday. dont get me wrong. i love my friends. they are my life. but you know. they dont always get me, and i rather keep myself quiet than creating a fight. im the one who is sad, and they are one who might "sulk". when i get back home its nothing. i feel like its empty. i want something new. something that will excite me. and a someone who can make me laugh every second and living the day with no tiredness and sulks but just fun! i only get that once in awhile. i looked at people's pictures, hanging out. and all i do is..lay back at home. open books. its so boring! my life is....empty. all i can see is pitch black. blank. nothing...
everyone is so busy with their own life, and i dont know what i am busy at.
other than that, amariah had her haircut. it was super duper short. well not that short. it was like my hair length now. despite of her too short bangs, her new hair is nice. i am quite jealous myself. because her hair is like natural staright. and mines are wavy. i know, im ugly -.- but she looks super duper adorable! :)
oh yeah, my far neighbour passed away. Dr. Mahather it is. you know what, eventhough that i dont really know his family. but i remember the time when me and my sister used to be so close to his kids. his wife doesnt really want their kids to be hanging around with us, maybe because she thinks that we are bad influence just because we just got back from england. but he lets us. he is a nice man. i am sure he will be missed by loads of people.
its a monthly test week, and yeah i have physics, maths and est tomorrow. i gotta go to sleep. just so you know, i did do my revision :)
i wonder if anyone thinks that i am boring..........
Did i tell you that my mum bought us tickets to see manchester united? i didnt, didnt i? well, im going to tell you now. if you want to know. i swear, that was the best night of my life! eventhough i didnt get to meet 'em face to face, but still i get to see them live, like infront of my eyes. at first i couldnt believe that they were infront of me, especially macheda and fabio! gosh, im melting. hee hee. although that i only get to sit at the second level. pfft, what a bummer. (you have to pay alot to sit beside the grandstand) but i am so thankful to get to see them. but i wish to take pictures with 'em, and hold their hands, get their jersey..and yaa know.
i dont know how to start, i'll just tell you the higlights.
it was so funny when the non-manchester supporters came to see them play. some of the guys went wearing arsengal and liverfool's jersey. and everyone started boo-ing. it wasnt a full house. so everything is undercontrol. i dont know where to begin. malaysia played poorly yesterday. they get injured alot. and my fabio got injured :( oh well...haha
it was sad when people booed at malaysians. you know what im started to think that some of the malaysians are disrespectful. especially when they did a one minute silence for indonesian bombing. it wasnt at silent. some stupid people start shouting across the stadium to shut up. "weh diam laaa" and the other side goes, "weeeh! diam laa bodoooh!". stupid. and the players start to look up, i bet they think that we are disrespectful and we couldnt take things seriously.
oh man, you know what this boy is soooo lucky! he got scholes jersey! scholes was like. "you, you!" and everyone was like "me?? OH ME!" and he pointed at a boy and he gave his jersey! he was a one lucky boy (shit). i think he gave the jersey to the little boy maybe to get him inspired and for the football generations. :) awww
i dont know what to say anymore, because only i know how it feels. hahaha. despite of people who went. so here's the pictures. that i got. i used a crap camera. oh well.
man u, do a little bit of warm up.
introduction, man u and malaysia shakes hand with sultan.
close up to manchester united. i can see, owen, evans, foster, fletcher, (not sure, not sure), brown, tossic, FABIO, macheda and i think its gary neville. wait..not sure again. lol. those are some lucky kids. i wish im them :(
again, malaysian team shaking hands with sultan. showing their big honour :)
the game started, the ball hits the post
FABIO :(, he's injured. he gets injured alot tho. poor him, now he is alone. without his twin brother, raphael. its alright lisa's here, i'll come for you :P
owennnnnnnnnn! the new comer replacing ronaldo no 7. im still sad about ronaldo. how could he do this to us :(
nani, berbatov, rio ferdinand ready to replace! GO NANI!
THIS PART IS SICK! its so funny, the paremedics came late, and berbatov was just like "oh wait, he is injured? okay" walks away. hahaha. yeah, poor him though. it doesnt look like it was a nasty fall.
roooneeyy! he hurt his ears.
on the bench
macheda, 41 scored a the goal. click to watch :)
okay as WE ALL know that man u is in malaysia. they played against malaysia and they defeated us 3-2. it was a fair play. and i think it was funny when van der sar accidentally let go the ball and amri scored the goal. cool :) nice wake up call. well..i really wannna watch it at the stadium. but my dad grr....
gosh, and more good news. man u decided to stay here. they were suppose to fly over to indonesia. but due to the bombing thingy. they want to stay here. and they will have a rematch! woohooo! i really wanna go this time. i wish my mum will buy us the tickets. she wants to, but she's busy. my dad is too. EVERYONES BUSY! the ticket holders will sell till 7:00 pm! THAT SUCKS. gargh! >:(
bet we're not going. when the hell are they gonna come here again? what when im 30?
sucks -.-. im sad. i wanna cryyyyy :'( i seriously do.
i went to dentist today. and yeah, my teeth is wobbling a bit. its because i have a gum problem. and they bleed. so then they do the scale thingy. they cleaned my teeth, and checked if my teeth hurts at certain point point. and yeah, it does. i got one baby tooth left, small one. and i didnt get it out while i was a little kid, (awww :P) and its gone now. they had to pull it out before it becomes worse. no wonder i feel like something was stuck to my wisdom teeth. and boy, it hurts. good thing that they sprayed something to make me feel numb. they offered me to inject my gum, and hell no! i hate needles. lol.
i asked my dentist do i need to get a braces. she said no. but if i still want to i can get retainers but not braces. but i think braces are lovely! :) hahhaa. i know, im crazy. so im thinking of getting retainers. hihi :)
well well, i am so bored and i cant find anything else to do. (should be opening books right now, but im too lazy :P) yeah i am lazy. its a boring sunday. i was supposed to go to the dentist today, me and my dad did, but it was closed. darn. just so you know, i am having a tooth ache. actually, its not really aching. its uncomfortable. its the root i think, and it feels like someone is trying to pull my teeth out. no touble with sleeping. my teeth are wobbling. not that kind of wobble wobble like the baby tooth. it wobbles a bit. and i am kind of worrying right now. what if i lose my teeth. i searched through the internet. they say that i dont take enough calcium and vitamins. and you got that right. i dont. and i need to starting from now. but i dont really like milk. i am thinking of getting braces. i dont know why, maybe im crazy but i find braces cool. haha. yeah weird. maybe after spm. so i wont face people laughing at me. i will meet new people after spm. maybe that i will be going to college with my braces on. cool innit? :) hahaha. im crazy.
today its his 17th birthday. happy birthday! wee. i am sorry that i didnt wish you last night (when i planned to), but i dont have a phone now. i was waiting for my mum to arrive yesterday from her class, but she came back late. i cant use the house phone. but the house phone is fixed now. i know that we already gave you the present but hey, today is your birthday, i still want to jot things down :) so, akmal akmal akmal. wow, i think that you are superb and we have gone through so much things together. i know i havent talk to you for i dont know how long. and i am sooo soo sorry. i did plan to not talk to you until your birthday arrive. heehee. but uhm, i did talk to just now right :) cool. okay. things i love about akmal. you always be there for your friends when they are in trouble. you never let people down. youre a person that i can count on. you can keep secrets. you know what to do. you love to make jokes, stupid ones too. youre good in cheering people up. youre strong, independent. you can play guitar, and i heard that you play drum too. go you! and the most things i love about you is, you you are a good listener. you listen to everything without commenting. that is you :) there is soo much wonderful things about you, and if i can, i would list it out. im so thankful i get to know someone like you. can you believe it? this is going to be our last year. were gonna go our seperate way. wow :O. heee.
we bought you a cake, and was planning to do a suprise party. but then, hari ni mmg takda ong. the futsal thingy got in our way. so i was frustrated that we didnt get to celebrate your birthday :( stupid futsal. why does it have to be today? grr. nadimah's fault. i hate her -.-. gr.
so okay, chillax. i hope you get to taste the cake. lol.
happy birthday best friend :)
i just cannot stand when people talk about me and him. okay, sure i dont want to talk to him, but that doesnt mean i will not talk to him forever. i am not going to repeat the same mistakes over and over again. its best if you leave things the way they are. i dont know why its so hard to talk to him nowadays, its just that im scared of what he'll say. i dont see the person that i used to know before. and if its possible i want you to stop forcing me what to do. why cant you understand? i am happy enough when i get to laugh with you guys. but you always say that i am not happy. what is the point really of saying that, to make me more miserable?? what do you want me to do to make me happy?!?!? fyi, i dont put that much happiness into this blog, because when im sad, or boring i always express myself through here. and that if i cant tell you because im scared that you'll get upset with me. even if i tell you, you wont understand. you will always tell me why i am wrong like what happened today in the class. it will be nicer if you can support me once in awhile. but why do you always tell me that i am wrong all the time. youre saying that you dont want to put the blame on me and youre not blaming on anyone, but why does it look like you are pointing at me? what does that make? yes, you are blaming on me. you dont know how i feel and you will never understand. i dont tell my problems to you because it revolves around me. i am the problem. me myself. i just want to see you guys happy, then i can happy. because that is the only thing left for me to think of. but, no. you go to school with sad faces, and there are no reasons to be happy when youre sad. all i do everyday is trying to cheer you up to make me happy. and you say that i can be the master plan when you are right now?. you said that you knew everything about him. how does that make you feel? embarassed? i was with him before, and its like youre saying i know nothing and i have learned nothing about him. i was trying to pick out something for him, but no. you said that its not his taste. and i somehow feel so darn stupid and embarassed. i am a terrible person okay? and maybe that is the reason why i should not be happy.
happy? :)
my whole body hurts all thanks to that stupid netball thingy. i hope i get the certificate and points for curriculum because if i dont, im gonna. hm, im not sure what i'll do. we lost all of our three games anyway. well, i dont really care about losing, because i dont even know how to play. and now, i cannot move my body. lol.
im so bored without a phone. i cant text with anyone, and i cant listen to music and everything. if only i can buy a new phone. but im sure my mum will never let me buy a new phone. not until if i get into college. darn it. im so sad. i miss that phone so badly. eventhough without it, i actually pay more attention when i study. but still, i feel so lonely without it. i cannot contact with anyone :(
im sorry i couldnt attend to the wedding yesterday. though it was only your brother's wedding. i wasnt feeling very well yesterday, with my condition. i cant move my body and it hurts. i was in bed all day. i wanted to contact you to say how sorry i am, but im sure you wouldnt care. besides, you will never expect me to come. you have lots and lot of friends. im sure they are there for you. im just the substitute. i dont have your number to contact you.
july test and spm trial is around the corner. i am so scared. i have to study. lisa you have to study.
his birthday is this wednesday. im not sure whats the plan is. all of the plan is according to amariah's. hm. somehow. i feel jealous. everyone wants the birthday to be special because they want to thank him for what he have done for them. and me too. everyone loves him :)
i hate birthdays.
bye :)
sometimes i feel so alone. i feel so sad. but sometimes i really need me time alone. in my situation right now is that i am alone, and i dont really have noone to talk to. even if i have friends, they wouldnt response that much. i would just have to fake my laughs just to get them in the mood. but, you know. if that makes them happy. i know that love will get in a way for somehow. and you'll eventually forget about you friends behind you. it will be like nothing with just you and a guy. but i dont have "the guy". and sometimes when i heard about my friends talking about boys, i dont know why i get pissed alot. but i cant show it to them. one, yes i am jealous. but i have noone to love right now. except of that baskin-robin guy, i wish i can make him mine. haha (get real). but hm, its okay. all i want to do is just focus on one lane, and hoping that there wouldnt be any distractions. i wish i can tell my friends how i feel, but i know that they would never want me to say that. instead of me being sad, its always the other way round. and i am the one who has to go after them. pft. whatever.
but other than that, i love the little card that was made by amariah. it was so sweet <3
yesterday was the parents evening where you know you have to bring your parents to school. and the teachers will tell your parents how we behaved and everything, bla bla bla. oh yeah, did i tell you that i failed my bm? no i didnt and yes i did. yeah, im terrible. well, the teacher is horrible as well, no that kind of horrible. shes fun, strict and she cursed alot. not that i dont like it. but ive never failed in my bm before. but, because of her markings, i did. and you know the systems. if you failed bm. you failed everything. so much for my hard work for getting 3A's huh? yeah. im so pissed. so enough about that. so yeah, in the morning, we were about to leave home. but the car wont start. so my mum said, just skip the school. so tak jd laaaa. so, is it a WOHOO? or, ohh maaaan. haha. i'll say between both. because i dont know why, for some reasons i want to listen to what the teachers are going to say about me. lol. bla bla bla. i hate zaki and iqbal. not that kind of hate. i hate them manually. like for instance, in education. they are so good in everything. im so jealous. i wish i can be smart like them. so it'll be easier for me to face spm.
i cannot wait for his birthday. its coming up, next week. though i havent talk to him for ages now. i reaallly do not know why. but...now..when i see him. i see a different person. not the one that i used to know. well...amariah knows more about him. she said so. so, i got nothing again.
i dont know really who am i close with right now. i am close with wawa and amariah at school but when i get home, its just me and my guitar..oh and books. thats just it. my life is completely blank right now. i dont know what i want, and i will never know what i really want. i wish i can have someone to hear my stories and act like its very important to them. sometimes i wish i can be important, and special...but. pftt. naah. blank. pale.....
kay, till then.
boring lisa
